100 things about myself!

I’ve always enjoyed reading lists like these on other blogs. They’re fun, insightful, and help me see the world from someone else’s perspective. So, as I work on restarting my website, here’s my own attempt at sharing a hundred things about me. TW - Some parts of my story, are not pleasant. I am sorry.

1. - I am the youngest child of my parents. 👶
2. - I was born in 1978. 🎂
3. - My birthdate was chosen by my parents, who opted for a Caesarean delivery.
4. - I have a sister who lives in the US. 🌎
5. - My name is Deepthy Chandrashekhar. The "y" is my father's South Indian touch. I was named after a dancer my father met at Bangalore Little Theatre (BLT).
6. - My birth was mentioned in BLT's newsletter, Backstage.
7. - I am 5 feet 3 inches tall. 📏
8. - I've always been a plus-sized baby.
9. - I am close to my maternal cousins.
10. - As a child, I loved skipping, reading books, and drawing. ✏️
11. - Trigger Warning: I am a survivor of childhood sexual abuse, which lasted from ages 5 to 12. I stopped it by confronting the abuser. 🛑
12. - I did not know I had to survive that. It did not come easily. I was a victim for years. One day I got tired of it, and since then I ahve been learning to surive. Learning to surive that experience has taught me about trust, self-acceptance, and forgiveness. 💪.. that i have them in dhort reserve...and have to grow them!
13. - I’ve been bitten by dogs three times. As a child, the first two incidents led to 14 belly injections each. 🐕
14. - My earliest dream, at age 4, was of carrying a bag with four puppies in the rain, alongside my sister holding an umbrella. ☔
15. - My first and only love is Grey. 💕
16. - I admire reptiles like lizards and snakes—from afar. 🦎
17. - My father played classical music every night. Bhimsen Joshi, Kumar Gandharva, and Gangubai Hangal were household staples. 🎶
18. - I doodle easily. 🖍️
19. - I started bleaching my face at 15 as I was repeatedly told I was dark skinned, and only stopped last month.
20. - I have a complicated relationship with food. 🍴
21. - I love dancing but only behind closed doors. 💃
22. - The happiest day of my life was when my last sister was born—I felt maternal. 🍼
23. - I struggled with school and eventually learned to cope. 📚
24. - I can listen to the same song on repeat until it feels like it's in my veins. 🎧
25. - I love the feeling of sunshine on my skin. ☀️
26. - I adore my freckles. 🌟
27. - I've worn kajal since I was 13, inspired by Shehnaz Hussain’s eyes. 👁️
28. - My first celebrity crush was Shivraj Kumar. Tuvi Tuvi Tuvi
29. - My mother was a movie buff who introduced me to international cinema. 🎥
30. - My childhood was rough. Turbulent seas.
31. - I ran away from home three or four times as a kid in response to abuse (physical, emotional, sexual). 🏃‍♀️
32. - I always apologize - even when i have not done anything wrong. 🙏
33. - I've always sought love. 💞
34. - I’ve loved deeply and leave it at that.
35. - My first boyfriend was my neighbor.
36. - My second boyfriend was controlling and struggled with alcohol. Breaking up with him led to years of guilt.
37. - Today, I’m a few kilos below my heaviest weight. ⚖️ Yeah!!!
38. - My mind is constantly creating art projects. 🎨
39. - I relate to Ekalavya—learning from everywhere. 🌱
40. - I am anti-war and anti-drugs. ✌️
41. - I love handloom saris. 💃
42. - I am drawn to Indian art and folk art worldwide. 🖼️
43. - I have lived within walls and locks for years. I am a huge Hayao Miyazaki fan. 🌸
44. - Most of my close friends have been since my college days 👯‍♀️
45. - I was diagnosed with ADHD in 2024 at age 46.
46. - I write aimlessly, always feeling like a story is inside me. ✍️
47. - I am deeply spiritual. 🕉️
48. - I love all things Japanese.
49. - Horror movies terrify me. 😨
50. - I struggle with routines despite good intentions.
51. - I follow the 12-step program to stay grounded.
52. - My dream is to make a quilt. 🪡
53. - I am in regular counseling for PTSD and anxiety. 🌱
54. - I hated school as a child, as I was bullied by two classmates and a teacher, who beat me regularly.
55. - The most beautiful person I’ve seen, apart from my mother, is Ms. Sharon Lowen.
56. - I dislike the concept of marriage but love the idea of a life companion. 💍
57. - I think I’d be a good mother. I’m already a great aunt. 🧸
58. - I love the sky and clouds. 🌤️
59. - Old, tall trees bring me comfort. 🌳
60. - I adore cat videos. 🐱
61. - I recently started playing Wordle and love it!
62. - I think counseling and therapy are invaluable. 🛋️
63. - I am experiencing baby fever at the age of 46.
64. - I prefer sitting cross-legged on the floor. 🧘‍♀️
65. - #MeToo - bit.ly/3W4TU4r
66. - I am tattoo-free but full of scars.
67. I was almost mauled by a leapord. 
68. - Popcorn at the movies is a must! 🍿
69. - I’ve struggled with self-worth all my life. I have always felt i was ugly, and unlovable.
70. - Jeans and T-shirts are my go-to. 👖
71. - Clean-shaven men > beards. Random but true.
72. - I wear a lot of black—it makes me feel good. 🖤
73. - I can cook well but prefer not to on workdays. 🥘
74. - Korean historical movies captivate me.
75. - I’m an extroverted introvert.
76. - My favorite song is Brand New Day by Sting and Stevie Wonder. 🎵
77. - A book is waiting to be written inside me. 📖
78. - Vanilla ice cream is my favorite. 🍨
79. - I’d love to meet Naseeruddin Shah.
80. - Leonard Bernstein would be my choice of a historical figure to meet. 🎼
81. - I aspire to write poetry and try my best - almost everyday on my whatsapp status.
82. - My worst years were between ages 5 and 30.
83. - I take photos mostly on my phone. 📱
84. - I was saved by grace in 2009. 🙏
85. - I am grateful for this life. 💕
86. - My website relaunch starts here. 🌐
87. - I once made a pen pal while researching Japanese culture. 🖋️ He was French! He visited me, and it was great!
88. - My favourite word this year is Mottainai. Look it up!
89. - My favourite quote from 12 Steps is - It wont happen in a day, but it will happen one day!
90. - I remind myself - I am worthy, talented. (hough I still dont believe it - feelings of insecurity and unworthiness are crippling)
91. - I gave up NSD to make my father happy.
92. - Prayers are a part of my sobriety.
93. - Embroidery is part of my sobriety. I need it!
94. - Long walks are my therapy. 🚶‍♀️
95. - The first celebrity I ever met, was Dr. Vishnuvardhan.
96. - I put out things on my social media, so people who follow me get to see one version of me. What I want to be kept pure and precious, i want to protect... i only reveal to the ones i love.
97. - I believe in acts of kindness, no matter how small, though i have been very unkind many times (mostly to my mother) and regret them. 🌟
98. - I end most days with gratitude and reflection. ✨ - I try!
99. - This is me—flawed, learning, and evolving.
100. xoxo, Dee 🥰